Monday, May 31, 2010

day 1

no pictures just a few words as i reel from the events of the day. Back at work as a minion of a telco. 2 weeks training day 1 sorta meet and greet. so far so good a cpl of tests i scrape through .... what a guy. stuff to do but i will try to continue a journal although circumstances may change this. for fucks sake is this serious steve tapping the keys . baby steps babe baby steps and as i unload (sic) i might me able to trace a thread or maybe a slight incline or decline depending on direction and perspective.

Friday, May 28, 2010

impressions

The nature of the medium
Ppl come from the 4 corners of the globe[a orb with corners?] and meet in space project a reality of themselves that might vary from thier reality by the narrowest of margins or the complete opposite of who they truly are and of course all points inbetween.
the online reasons that drive ppl are as varied as the ppl that travel the highway.
mine is connect to free thinking ppl who can challenge and be challenged
and have a laugh or two along the way. And share bits of me and mine.
so if you are a bit of a funster don’t take yourself too seriously, and don’t mind your belief systems being given a bit of a shake[ just to make sure they work] join in and give as good as you get


make your mark and maybe it will leave an impression

intangibles

Humanity has advanced, when it has advanced, not because it has been sober, responsible, and cautious, but because it has been playful, rebellious, and immature.

Tom Robbins
The above quote helps me make sense of stuff


How do I weigh up the intangibles?

if I am destined to judge ppl by my standards, such as they are. Will ppl continually fall short of my minimum standard..i truly hope not but, the signs aren’t encouraging, I would like the ppl I consider friends to think kindly of me, if I don’t care for your company does that mean the friendships over. All friendships are conditional on certain agreed or perceived set of standards, agenda driven friendships are the glue that binds, if I have something you want what depths will you plummet to get your agenda fulfilled tis murky waters that we swim nay drown in if we cant just appreciate the moment and have to be considering the benefits of friendship then fuck it I aint playin’. Sometimes a feeling of sadness follows the end of something that had all the signs of the promise of a healthy exchange. Why do ppl present based on what they think you want them to be?? I want ppl to truly be themselves then we are all starting from the same position. And what we make of it can be as good or as bad as our motives dictate. This is not a lasting truth ‘cept to say that now it rings true to the feeling me and the thinking me.

The loss of what shows promise leaves a little hollow spot within me.
I rue what might have been but am happy for each and every moment to continue the journey to destinations unknown…

2 kinds of ppl

It has been brought into a soft focus how sexual politics works when its not based on gender I have had an occasion to be placed in an interesting position, an informal meeting with friends was joined by other friends when the mix was 5 women and 3 blokes one being myself. the fun began, alliances were noted then it was shake hands and come out swinging, As the evening progressed it became apparent to me how some revel in the spotlight playing up in the self deluded idea that time in the spotlight was all that was needed to woo the crowd, while others seek to target their prey and lock on oblivious to any extraneous influences in the mix .a third approach is to size up the opposition and then attempt to defeat them in some battle of comparison of bigger tits better job or ffs nicer fucking shirt. and playin one person off against another has been raised to an art form While this alcohol fuelled conversation continued it became clearer the gloves were off and cracks formed in manners and beautiful became unattractive in a matter of words. Why do people want what it seems they can’t have? As soon as it was apparent that I was going home without the person with whom I arrived the games went up a notch. Nasty became the norm and reflectorman was suited up and showing ppls ugliness to them, .shit pay but great job satisfaction Which brings me to my point.. The 2 kinds of ppl are1, ppl who like to see others vying and competing for their attention and will go to great lengths to get [sic] friends and former lovers in the same room and conversations and then play games.

and the other kind who feel each and every jibe directed at others and rather than play the game they walk away.

If you need to ask you which one you are you already know. and you are likely to tip your hand the next time the heady aroma of power fill your nostrils.